I seem to have a much better attitude about our crew being gone this week than I have for past Mimi visits. But I still find it strange and unsettling not to have the kiddos around at all. I miss them. Our house, our life, is so empty without them.

It makes my heart go out to all the families that I know are longing and praying for the pitter-patter of little feet in their home–even if I know it’s more like the thundering of migrating wildebeests than the pitter-patter anything!

And it makes my heart go out to people that don’t want children.

They can be a fiery trial, no doubt about it. But it’s a refining fire.The spiritual steadfastness and eternal joy produced by motherhood–it simply cannot be duplicated by adopting a pet or doing charity work or adding another hobby to your life. There is a life-long consistency to the demands of motherhood that no other commitment I’ve ever made can compare to.

It’s soul-shaping.

And this time, while my kiddos are away on vacation, I think I’ve been able to breath deeply and reflect on it, enjoy it, value it…

And reaffirm the truth that I would never go back.

I would never go back to seeing the world without the weight of my children’s future shaping my view.

I would never go back to seeing my time without the filter of my children’s needs to set my priorities.

I would never go back to seeing my home without the growth of my children’s hearts to guide my decorating.

And yet, here we are with a week to ourselves. (Well, part of week. We still have to work. This isn’t our vacation, it’s theirs.)

But here’s our chance to do all the things we enjoyed before we had kids to keep us busy. Our chance to just do adult things and have adult conversations and not worry about little ears or bedtimes or snack times or taking extra underwear everywhere with us.

Here’s our/my bucket list for the week:

1. Go antiquing without worrying about little fingers. (DONE!)

2. Go out to dinner without anyone ordering chicken nuggets. (DONE! Not only did no one having chicken nuggets, but we both had soup, salad, grilled fish, and broccoli–it was the most “adult” meal we’ve had in, well, forever!)

3. Put the Hemi in the garage for a front-end alignment and inspection. (In progress as we speak! Doing the one-vehicle shuffle just works so much better when it’s just the two of us!)

4. Put the GMC in the garage for a front-end alignment and inspection.

5. Clean the house (Mostly DONE.)

6. Make some more paper-covered journals to use up some scraps. (In progress.)

7. Make lunchbox notes for the upcoming school year and use up some more scraps. (In progress.)

8. Clean up my papercrafting and get onto some sewing projects.

9. Go to Target to return some things and pick up some things and not even look at the toy aisle! And savor a triple grande cinnamon dolce latte while I’m at it!

10. Weed the flower beds.

Turns out my week without the kids is pretty much the same as my weeks with the kids–except more quiet.

I had thought that I would just get more done of everything on the list than I would if I was also supervising my 3 littles at the same time. But honestly, they’re such big helpers that I find I’ve got tons of extra work to do! I had to harvest the garden, feed and water all the animals, gather and wash the eggs, get the mail, walk the dog, and straighten the whole downstairs myself yesterday evening. It took almost two hours rather than our normal one!

When you have unexpected time to yourself, what do you like to do with it?