Yesterday I sat in on a Facebook chat with Melanie Young, co-author of Raising Real Men (which I absolutely devoured last year!) about, well, raising real men. {smile}
I also recently read a stunningly simple blog post by Ashleigh Baker that was a beautiful summary of my own mish-mash thoughts after the 2:1 Conference.
And this is what comes to my mind…
We all need to be careful, readers and writers alike, what authority we speak with and recognize in our lives, and understand the difference between the stories of our peers and authentic wisdom. As everything else, it requires balance–which I find is only achieved by prayer with an open mind and heart–and which is often proved out in my own life by the bitter fruit produced by chasing after the exact opposite! {smile}
Having a community of supportive peers, women walking by my side through motherhood and marriage, lifting me up and urging me on, has been one of the greatest blessings for me from blogging and social media! But I also find that the Lord has been working on my heart about being more discerning in this area. Urging me to realize that my peers may share their story, but not necessarily wisdom as He would have me seek. That there is a perspective that is only gain through trial and experience, that truly is determined by longevity.
My peers, my beloved friends, are walking this road with me. But sometimes we need to find the women who are walking ahead of us!
I’ve been married for 11 years (12 this December!) and a mother for 9 years this summer. And sometimes it seems I look around and we’ve been married and parenting longer than everyone in our age group. There’s a blank spot in our circle representing 15-20 year marriages and most of our acquaintances that are that 5-10 years further down the road parenting-wise, do not have an equally mature marriage.
Sometimes I need to be seeking out women that have been married 20 years, 30 years…have children in high school, or college, or are experienced grandmas who have seen their children through adulthood. Ladies who have proven, through the example of their solid marriage or their faithful adult children, that they already know how to walk the path I desire to take.
I think there’s a couple challenges here.
One is a generation gap related to using technology. Let’s be honest, most grandma’s are not blogging.
A second is replacing our real life church family with a virtual community. The more I reach out to the godly women in our church family, the more they fill that empty spot with their experience and wisdom. And encouragement–oh how sweet is the encouragement from someone who’s been married 35 years and raised 3 beautiful, God-fearing children and says “Sweetheart, you’re doing just fine!”
Since the Titus 2:1 Conference, I have felt the Lord calling me to greater humility. There is a difference between sharing stories, sharing information, and sharing wisdom. In this space, here at Walking in High Cotton, I share stories. I share experiences. I share ideas. And each reader has to use their own discernment as to whether it speaks wisdom into your life.
But I also feel like the Lord is speaking to me about seeking…seeking out more mature fellowships. Seeking out relationships–not to replace!–but to balance the good friendships I’ve made within my peer group since I’ve been blogging. Cultivating relationships and discovering godly resources that mentor to me where I am in this life.
I’m not sure if that means through more blogging, or less, or not.
But I do know that a seeking heart will be rewarded with wisdom and knowledge.
Do you find the on-line environment to be more heavily weighed toward youth and inexperience rather than experience and godly wisdom? Do you ever find yourself suddenly questioning someone’s authority/confidence on certain topics after you read their About page?
