5 Signs You’re NOT Ready for Marriage — 13 Comments

  1. Marriage is a triangle with God at the top and the couple looking up at Him rather than gazing at each other 🙂

  2. I was a young bride, only 19, but I firmly wanted the marriage and wasn’t so much concerned with the actual wedding. Truth be told, I would have been happy to just have gone to the court house and had the “wedding” done and over with. But, family insisted. Now here we are almost 20 years later – and I still kinda wish we had just gone to the court house, lol. That wedding was just the fluff ~ the real life nitty gritty of marriage is where the good part really is.

  3. I really liked your first point. I believe love is a choice. It’s a decision we make every day to put our spouse before ourselves. It’s hard. It’s work. And it’s totally worth it.

  4. I’m a newlywed (7 months!) and a firm believer that a Marriage should be based on the vow, not the feelings. Even when we were going through pre-marital counseling with our Minister, it seemed like even HE was more focused on what the WEDDING would be like, rather than the MARRIAGE. I’m glad that you’ve written this down and I hope that it seriously blesses some young engaged couples!


  5. Love this! I wish more people would THINK before they jump head first into something so sacred & life making. Not life changing – life making. Thank you for writing this. Great read for the soon to be married & great reminders for the already married. Blessings!

    • I think marriage is one area where we could all benefit from more wise counsel! We try so hard as parents to raise our children to be independent, that we’re forgetting how to raise them to function within a marriage and family.

  6. I was nodding along here. Ken gets asked to perform a lot of weddings, and even with the time he spends with them, it’s sobering because he feels about half the couples have no idea what marriage is. t’s so easy to get sucked into the pretty white dress, the color scheme, the wedding presents….but it’s just a day. Life keeps on rolling and you have to know how to roll with it!

    • I remember sitting in my pre-marital counseling and almost feeling like the monsignor was trying to talk us out of get married at one point. (We were getting some of that from other people as well.) Now I see he was just trying to get us to THINK as well as FEEL. I think maybe it’s something that has to start long BEFORE any engagement rings or wedding plans–if you don’t have a grasp on it before the wedding planning, it’ll be hard to wrap your hands around it after you start tasting cakes and picking a dj. {smile} Not that anyone can REALLY get it all before you live it. But I think we can do a better job preparing our kiddos (and especially our daughters) than I’m seeing.

  7. Wonderful post! And yes, when the average marriage cost $20,000 (that was 15 years ago when we got married) something is not right. My husband also lost his ring and I can’t wear mine because of a metal allergy. The receipt for our rings looks similar to yours in price. I am so glad we didn’t spend thousands on rings.

    • Me too! I believe in the symbolism in all the wedding traditions, but I’m not buying into the commercialism of them. I believe in wearing rings, and what they represent and mean–but they don’t have to cost thousands. My Dad painted cars for 15 years and didn’t wear his ring because it might scratch the car he was working on or get caught on something. It bothered me and I said something to my Momma and she said she was fine with it. She knew he believed in their marriage and she’d rather him leave it safely at home than lose his finger over it. When he left that career, he started wearing it again. You have to maintain perspective.