Our kiddo work. Hard. Every. Single. Day. And I’m not talking about making their beds or putting their toys away. They sweat, they haul. they dump, they drag, they scrub, they pull…you name it around here and they’ve probably put hands to doing it. And because we post so many pictures of outside work, sometimes folks ask if they do any inside chores. Oh yes, they do! They do laundry (every single step in the process!), load and unload the dishwasher, sweep the floors, empty the trash cans, dust, vacuum, feed the dog…they help with just about everything inside too.

So why are we a no-allowance family?

Well, first of all, I mean no allowance for chores. I’ll talk briefly about spending allowances at the end of the post. But we do not give money allowance for doing home and farm chores. It’s certainly not because we don’t think they work hard enough to earn it! So why don’t we have a special reward system of points and cents, or folded papers in a jar, to make money and teach our children responsible money management?

Well, the first and biggest reason we are a no-allowance family is because…

1. In the real-world nobody pays you for taking care of your own home and your own stuff!

And this is their home and their things. Their floors, their food, their backyard, their beds, their clothes, their pets…It belongs to the whole family and they are part of the family. It belongs to the whole household and until they move out and establish their own household, this is theirs.

If anything, the privilege of having your own home and things usually means you have to pay out for the upkeep in time and money. Intentional parenting around here means that we’re in this daily grind side-by-side with our kiddos, teaching them how to go out and make their own life, by living right here in this one with us! The real-life reward for taking care of your own stuff is simply getting to have it. The reward for washing clothes is having clean clothes to wear. The reward for washing dishes is having clean dishes to use. It’s not money. They can’t go through life expecting fiscal compensation for taking care of their own home and family.

We want our children to internalize a sense of responsibility which gives them a sense of accomplishment as a reward. 

2. It teaches self-discipline and character.

Sometimes we have to do things just because they need to be done. Not because we like them. Not because they are fun. Not because we get paid for it or get anything out of it. Just because it needs to be done. Home and farm chores are one of the easiest ways to directly teach this lesson I can imagine. The floor has to be cleaned. Do it. Move on. That’s how you get through the blasé parts of life to the good stuff.

3. It teaches skills and a heart for home and family.

We’re trying to raise children that are ready to head out into the world and manage their own homes and lead and raise their own families. The chores they are given around here help them learn the skills they need to do that. Along the way it fosters an appreciate for a clean home, a maintained yard, healthy animals, good food, and a host of other important parts of a happy home life. We want the jobs they do around here to be reaching into their hearts for good, not greed.

4. Allowance does not offer fair compensation for the job.

These penny jobs and $2 chores create a strange, false realism. We’re paying them far below what their time and effort is actually worth and saying that we’re teaching them something. What are we teaching them? That their work is inferior and they should be paid less? Or that they should be paid less just because they’re young? They are doing the exact same job that I would be doing if they weren’t–and we expect them to do it correctly, so we’re not accepting an inferior job here! So how can you justify paying them pennies or a few dollars when you know market rate would be $10-$20/hr for that job? You’re not offering them fair compensation for what they did, you’re just offering them something for what they did.

5. It teaches a right relationship with money.

We see no valuable lesson about stewardship involved in paying them for helping the family at home. If anything, it seems to breed entitlement and a lack of self-motivation.

We like to give our kiddos a stake in the actual profit-making side of the farm that they participate in. If they are part of something that actually makes “real-life” money (like our egg business) then they get a share of that money. Just like we’ve talked before about giving them a stake in decision-making for their chore-areas, they get a financial stake in business ventures they helped with.

This is what we consider a fair, real-world financial return for their effort. It also helps them understand that none of us make a profit until after expenses are paid, that diligence and efficiency are directly related to fiscal compensation, and that there’s never as much as you expected! {smile}

Along with that, our kiddos don’t need an allowance to learn money management because there is other money for them to learn to handle. They help us make farm spending decisions. They have their own gift money to spend. They participate in church fundraising projects for their youth activities. They help with the grocery shopping and couponing. They help shop with a budget for their own school supplies and clothes.

I think it’s important to say that if there’s one thing I’ve learned from parenting it’s to never say never! {smile}

This is our philosophy now. It might change. The farm might change. The kiddos might change. But I don’t like the idea of an allowance and can’t foresee changing my mind on that.

If you want to give them their own spending money, I think it’s a better plan to simply sit down, decide on a fair amount, and develop a budget with them. If they want more, they can go get a job in the neighborhood to earn it at a fair, real-world-negotiated rate–in their spare time after their responsibilities at home are met. (Just like you and I!) Even with all our kiddos do, their work only takes about 40 minutes a day during the week, broken into two 20-30 minute blocks morning and evening. (You can see our chore routine here.) They have plenty of time to pursue other activities.

I’d love to hear about your experience with allowances!

We’re still new to this parenting thing and have a lot to learn and experience! 

And if you’re interested in more of our chore posts, visit these reader favorites…

Kids and Chores…What ARE Chores?

Kids and Chores…Making Routines {and Why We Don’t Switch Chores Very Often}

Our Kids Top 10 Summer Chores

6 Tips for Raising Hard Workers

5 Tips for Helping Siblings Get Along

Raising Children that are Diligent

Growing a Family (these pictures of my littles doing BIG work just make me tear up every time!)

5 Reasons Why We Set High Standards

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Updated on March 31, 2017