I’m not a fan of mowing the grass.
Don’t get me wrong, I like when our grass is mowed. I just don’t like to be the one doing the mowing. For various reasons. I’m not a fan of the noise of the mower…I have allergies…I don’t like to sweat…I like to take pictures of Mr. Fix-It while he’s mowing…
But this weekend I mowed.
Here’s a few tips for those less experienced than I–if there are any such folks exist!

- Even though it’s a ride-on mower, it’s not a tractor. It doesn’t have 4-wheel drive. Lifting the deck does not mean you can go over limbs or through mud without consequences.

- The front is narrower than the back and you can’t turn on a dime. Translation: Just because your front tires fit between the grapevine posts doesn’t mean your back tires will.
- Lifting the deck doesn’t make you skinnier.

- It does, however; make it easier for your deck wheels to get tangled in the fence.

- Inanimate objects like hoses, tennis balls, and grunting stuffed hedgehogs don’t jump up and get out of your way just because you’re on the mower barreling down on them.
- Neither do fence posts.
- Neither do chickens.

- Going down hill in reverse feels much faster than going downhill forwards.
- Lawn mowers don’t have rearview mirrors.
- Firepits don’t move for lawn mowers either.
How was your weekend?
