Tips For Mowing Grass

I’m not a fan of mowing the grass.

Don’t get me wrong, I like when our grass is mowed. I just don’t like to be the one doing the mowing. For various reasons. I’m not a fan of the noise of the mower…I have allergies…I don’t like to sweat…I like to take pictures of Mr. Fix-It while he’s mowing…

But this weekend I mowed.

Here’s a few tips for those less experienced than I–if there are any such folks exist!

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See the fun of not mowing?
  • Even though it’s a ride-on mower, it’s not a tractor. It doesn’t have 4-wheel drive. Lifting the deck does not mean you can go over limbs or through mud without consequences.
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This is why we rotate the animals around...
  • The front is narrower than the back and you can’t turn on a dime. Translation: Just because your front tires fit between the grapevine posts doesn’t mean your back tires will.
  • Lifting the deck doesn’t make you skinnier.
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This is what you get when you "rest" the grass for a while.
  • It does, however; make it easier for your deck wheels to get tangled in the fence.
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Toys are totally overrated--just give your kids grass to play with.
  • Inanimate objects like hoses, tennis balls, and grunting stuffed hedgehogs don’t jump up and get out of your way just because you’re on the mower barreling down on them.
  • Neither do fence posts.
  • Neither do chickens.
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Kept them occupied for 2 hours!
  • Going down hill in reverse feels much faster than going downhill forwards.
  • Lawn mowers don’t have rearview mirrors.
  • Firepits don’t move for lawn mowers either.

How was your weekend?

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