I have taken 54 pictures of our summer so far.

54 photos since May 20th.

This from a person who’s Flickr acct includes 46,654 images, since May 2010.

Part of me finds this appalling!

I LOVE taking pictures.

I love paging through pictures of my crew and seeing their little faces–happy or not–and their moments…all the activities we’ve done together…all the growth and change around us as we’ve moved forward with this farming, homesteading life…those 46,654 pictures bring me so much joy!

But I’ve been tired. Tired in the deep, quiet places. And my camera has stayed in the bag.

But I hauled it with us when we went car camping over the 4th (since size and weight didn’t matter as long as it still fit in the back of the truck!) and snapped my 54 pictures. Not my normal 100+ for a weekend–until I get more skilled with my camera, I buy into the theory of the more snaps the more chance one will be awesome!–but it felt good. They suffered from lack of focus, blur, and bad lighting, but it felt good.

You know, I started off the summer back in May with plans. With a vision. With anticipation. And I took a couple hard hits. My “baby” graduated from K5. I lost my Grandma Koeller. We started facing a lot of decisions with the farm and our family’s future plans…and I just needed to shut down and find some quiet time to process it all. Now I feel a little like a bear coming out of hibernation. Not quite wide awake, but hungry and feeling driven to get back to the business of every day living again.

That every day isn’t necessarily going to be easier, but sometimes you just have to pick yourself up and get back in the race, tired or not. Heck, broken ankle or not! Sometimes you just have to throw some dirt on it and get back out there.

So the way I figure it, I average about 900 pictures a month. That puts me about 1400 pictures behind so far this summer.

Good thing we have a wedding coming up soon.

I’ve gone through dry spells before. I’m sure you have too. Here some things from the last couple weeks that have helped me make my way back to higher ground this time…

• Faithful church attendance. We’ve been making it to Sunday School, Sunday morning service, Wednesday prayer meeting, and now Sunday night service. I’ll be the first to admit that this is a challenge for our family and honestly, we’re up to about 90% faithful in this area. But out of a 168 hours a week, it’s simply not too much to give God about 7 of those back in his house and we’re committed to it now. Why does this help? Because that gives me a lot of good preaching to listen too and be encouraged by!
• Serving. Mr. Fix-It and I taught a VBS class together this year. That was our first time teaching and serving so intensely together. 5th and 6th grade BOYS no less! {smile} And we really enjoyed it. The whole chaotic, messy, wild, time of it! And it was such an encouragement to my heart each day to see the boys’ anonymous prayer requests. We saved them all and still pray over them regularly. Why does this help? Because it takes my mind off of me and my problems and brings back a focus on others.
• Singing. Seriously, nothing gives me goosebumps like some of the old, patriotic, hymns of the faith. Nothing! Is it crazy to love 4th of July music? How can you not be moved by words like these? “He has sounded forth the trumpet that shall never call retreat;He is sifting out the hearts of men before His judgment-seat:Oh, be swift, my soul, to answer Him! be jubilant, my feet! Our God is marching on!” Why does this help? Because the songs are something I can pull out to my mind and mouth when I need to change my attitude without changing my current situation.

Do you have things that really help you when you get down and out? Little things that stack up to make a big difference?

{By the way, that hymn, if you’re not familiar (you probably are and just don’t recognize it without the chorus!) is The Battle Hymn of the Republic and you can see the words or listen to it here.}